Here I am, I know after a long time. It feels good to be here again. I hope all my readers are doing good and even if you are not, don’t worry, things will be good eventually. Wait, you might be thinking how am I so sure that everything will be good, to be honest, I’m not! I don’t know how actually this theory of “Happy Ending” works, life is not a Bollywood movie! Things can’t always end well. A Happy ending is basically the outcome of our desires, well at least it gives us hope.
If you’ve read my previous blogs, you might be thinking that at least I should not give any advice regarding happy endings and ultimate goals. You’re actually right, I am completely incapable of doing that. I believe that to even think about future as a whole, you need to have hold of your thoughts at present and guess what? Umm… I don’t have hold of myself right now. I’m in that phase where you can’t even list your priorities. I know sounds dramatic, but it is true. And the funniest part is I’m not able to find people who’re facing this problem, I mean I’m pretty sure there might be more people too. I tried finding, but all I hear from people of my age are things about their breakups and how they really need to work hard toward their goals, I once again fail to fit into any single category. I’m scared and when I say this; I mean it! I’m scared of myself!!, my indecisiveness and me being completely against mediocrity. Trust me I don’t hate people who are mediocre and sometimes I do think that they are probably the happiest ones because they’re away from this dreadful and hilarious constant need of perfectionism. I don’t know, why I’m so obsessed with the idea of success. It’s getting on my nerves, I’m in a state where I’ve started hating myself because I’m not up to the mark. It has become a necessity for me to become really big! Ironically, I don’t even know in which field.
Everything is taking a toll on me, this blog is probably the only “me” thing in my life. I don’t know, there is a constant feeling of being hollow, just because I’m not where I want to be. The worst part is that I’m just 17 and I’m willing to blow my entire life up in smoke, just to create something epic and be successful. All this is inexplicably scary!
See! Even my blog doesn’t have a happy ending! But it’s just okay. (I guess)
Do you hesitate to try your hand at new things? Do you feel that trying some stuff can be a pure waste of time or might lead to some kind of regret? Do you realize what you’ll regret the most? NOT TRYING AND EXPLORING! Doing something new is far more copacetic than you think it is.
Well, we all love to stay in our comfort zones and see time passing by.Hmmm….. doesn’t the idea of having a comfortable and perfect life sounds amazing? I’m sure it does and I’m not saying that it’s wrong or something, it’s just that sometimes pushing yourself can give you a sense of being complete.Okay, so how many of you know how to do a cartwheel? Or to skateboard? Don’t you regret not trying it out? Don’t you think that you should try out that new Vietnamese restaurant or listen to maybe a genre of music you’ve never tried before? See all these things are mere examples of stuff which we don’t try just because they are not in our comfort zone.Well, pushing limits ain’t meaningless, right? You do not need to be 16 years old to live and be young. All of this might sound completely philosophical and impractical but it is still true and you know it. Look you don’t need to sacrifice priorities of life to live young or have fun, you just need to appreciate and acknowledge the importance of exploring new ideas, new things, new cultures, etc.
It doesn’t always need to be fancy; umm what do you think about inviting your housemaid’s family for dinner and hearing their life stories and experiences, trust me it’s more than satisfying.Seriously, been there and done that. You can actually find fun and explore more even if you think that it’s too late or not really possible in your busy life. Human race is beautiful, this world is beautiful and most importantly the philosophy of curiosity to know more, to dream big, to travel more is inexplicably majestic and serene at the same time.You don’t need to be an optimist or have an ability to turn darkness into light to understand that.You just need to believe to feel such eternal beauty! Your mind has got it all, well who do you think imagined about unicorns and rainbow poops? One of us, right?Then why are we stuck in societal boundaries that limit our will to reach that possibility zone? I know it’s classy to be posh but sometimes just let it go and leave all the gauche.There’s a lot to life, live it.
P.S – This blog wasn’t like this initially, I still believe it lacks a lot but whatever it is, it would not have been possible if I hadn’t had a conversation with someone who pushed me to realize my own thoughts! I know weird, right? I don’t need to name that person, you know who you are. Thank you.
What does living in the moment mean to you? Why do people say let’s live in the moment and mostly they end up getting wasted at a party? Don’t you find it ironical? Anyway trying not to deviate from the aim of this blog, do we actually realize the importance of living in the moment? Now I’m sure I’m not the only one who believes that we’ve very little time to live. Let me break it down for those who don’t, it’ll be simple calculations but I suggest you should grab some water before we start.
Okay to begin with; see an average human lives for around 70 years which is 613,200 hours in total, out of which 204,400 are gone in sleeping (8 hours/per day and that’s decent okay), now out of 408,800 hours left, even if you work from 9 to 5 another 204,400 hours are gone and now we end up with just 204,400 hours, on an average a person needs at least 4 hours everyday for personal chores like eating, bathing, pooping, etc which is like another 102,200 hours in total and now don’t worry we still have another 102,200 hours to enjoy life right? But wait, did I not mention the amount of time we spend daily on commuting and people living in metro cities might even start crying when it comes to this but wait there’s more! Like the amount of time we spend on gossiping (I mean duh! Accept it or not, we all do have the ability to make our own version of Gossip Girl okay.) and and wait I believe I haven’t mentioned how much time we spend on Tap, Scroll and Swipe! Okay so let’s say after all of this we are still left with around 5,000 hours to live. It’d be easier if I convert this to days, umm which is approximately just 208 days.(Yes that’s less than a year!!) and the sad reality is I haven’t taken into account a lot of other stuff which binds us to the monotony of life. So while you’re reading this the clock continues to tick tick tick tick! Trust me it won’t wait for you, for me or for anyone! There’s no pause button in this game.
Feeling terrified? Take a sip and breathe.(Take deep breaths, trust me you need them because you’re gonna run out of them soon!) My aim of writing this blog was not to scare you or to bring any more stress in your life than you already have, it was simply to show you the reality and yeah I went the bitter way. Why do you wanna exhaust yourself before time actually exhausts? We start running from Day 1 and we keep running, running for grades, running for jobs, running for money, running for status, running for fame and the moment you feel you’ve won this race, you realize that you ran way too FAR from life. Life started running with you but you left it so behind that now you can’t even see it with binoculars on! It all started when we mistook life for a race when it was supposed to be just a journey! You think that life will ultimately come to you with time right? But wait how much time we were left with again?
P.S – I don’t have it all figured out , these are just my thoughts. I am just 16 okay. Wait! 16 YEARS HAVE GONE BY ALREADY??
Being a 16 year old teenager, this question keeps revolving in and around my thoughts.What will make me happy? I know happiness has a different meaning for everyone but here I am talking about an area which mostly has an objective answer.I am talking about my career decision and I don’t think that a lot of people would disagree that it ain’t as easy as it looks or sounds.Now, I’ve been a very fortunate person with parents who are supportive of almost all decisions I make, they never forced me to do something that I didn’t wish to do or be something or someone specific.All they ever said was “WHATEVER YOU DO, BE THE BEST IN YOUR FIELD” and this gave me complete liberty to design my life which I don’t think a lot of kids get, especially in the country I live (I live in India if you didn’t know).Since I had the liberty to do what I wanted, I decided to do something that’d make me happy and give me satisfaction.That is when I realized that I actually never knew what gave me happiness! Is it money? Is it fame? Is it related to inventing something? Do I need a guitar to realize it?(No pun intended) and many more things.I knew that travelling gave me the ultimate satisfaction but I obviously need money bills to travel so didn’t know how to go with that.
Earlier it was a lot of fun doing this, I would spend hours in front of my laptop’s screen exploring thousands of careers and you cannot even imagine what all I came across. Seriously, did you know there’s a job which requires you to smell people’s farts and make a report on their health using that!(I know right!) But as time passed it became more of a haunted question which I started avoiding because out of thousands of careers, I couldn’t even find one which defined me. Stuff started getting worse when I tried to understand what defined me, I couldn’t even fathom how unaware I was about myself.This was unacceptable! Everyone has a hobby or hidden talent like dancing, singing, sketching, cooking,etc but sadly I realized that I didn’t have one specific hobby, my hobby changed every week and sometimes everyday! All I knew was that I have been always afraid of living a monotonous life and I honestly accept that this could be just a teenage rush thing. I started drowning in conundrum of thoughts about me which started making me miserable. At one point I came to a decision of becoming an engineer because it sounded safe (I know!).
I still haven’t reached a point where I can say I have my life sorted and maybe I won’t be able to ever figure it out but for the time being I have started doing stuff which I enjoyed all the way till date, like writing, meeting new people, sharing what I believe,etc.I am trying not to let my future completely obliterate the fun of my today and this blog being my first can be a beginning of something which can give me a little direction or maybe simply not. Whatever it is , at least I felt satisfaction while writing this.
PS: 9 to 5s scare the hell out of me.